So, you’re out there in the dating world. Maybe you’re young, single and think you know everything. Or, maybe your old(ish), recently unattached (read divorced), and think you know everything. It’s time for a little dating reminder (read “reality check”).
Dating can be a lot like baseball.
1. Hits In baseball sometimes its a base hit but sometimes you have a fly ball or get tagged out before you get to base. A lot like dating. That first date (a “hit”) can lead to something or it’s dead in the water before you get through the first drink. And, like baseball, don’t try to revive it by arguing with the umpire or, in the case of dating, having that second drink. Go back to the dugout and live to fight another day.
2. No Hitters In baseball, a no hitter is a good for one team and bad for the other. In dating, a no hitter is always bad. That means you’re in a dating dry spell. You can’t seem to get anything going–everything you try meets with no success. It’s time to go back to the batting cages and develop a new strategy.
3. Errors In baseball, an error occurs when a player makes a dumb mistake that screws up the play and may cost the team the game. Sound familiar? Common errors in dating include calling a date by the wrong name, drunk texting and regretting it in the morning (this falls under the broad heading of drunken mistakes). Your error may not have cost you the relationship but you definitely don’t want to keep committing them.
Leagues: Dating and baseball both have leagues but that’s where the similarities end. Unlike baseball, in the dating world you can’t be playing in the minor leagues and then suddenly be called up to the majors. It doesn’t work like that. As much as you’d like to convince yourself to the contrary, trying to date out of your league just doesn’t work. The medical profession has a word for it—delusion (a belief held with strong conviction despite superior evidence to the contrary). There are only two ways that you can change your league in the dating world—money (which includes celebrity status) and plastic surgery. These are the only two scientifically proven methods to catapult you up the dating food chain.
So, why do some singles only attempt to date out of their league? I think we’ve all encountered UMPS (Upwardly Mobile Pretentious Singles). Unlike the umpires in baseball, UMPS falsely believe they have control of the game. UMPS refuse to look at, let alone even go out with, people that the rest of the population thinks is perfect for them. They are only trying to date outside their league. They probably, at some point in their lives, dated someone out of their league and now they’re addicted. They can’t help themselves. They wrongly believe that if did it once, they can do it again.
Be open-minded. Dating should be a thinking “outside the box” experience. It’s not rocket science—it’s human relationships. No formulas, no empirical data, no methodology. It’s about playing the game–all nine innings. Trying to get hits, dealing with the outs, and working towards that elusive home run. When it’s your turn up at the plate, just close your eyes and swing. It’s more about leaps of faith than looking before you leap.